1. inclined to be silent or uncommunicative in speech: reserved
2. restrained in expression, presentation, or experience
Grocery lists, checks, book reviews, status updates, tweets, a personal blog. These are the things I don’t mind sharing. They’re general. They’re in keeping with my perceived personality. They are safe.
I don’t want to be safe anymore. I want to write what I want, how I want, when I want. I don’t want to answer to anyone else. I need a space to do that. So here it is.
Reticent because I am reserved in real life. I don’t want the attention, the funny looks, the awkward silences that “being me” might garner.
I am restrained by the arbitrary rules of the community in which I live. Of who I am. Of what I supposedly represent. Rules not made by the One whose authority I fully recognize and respect, but by those who stand as representatives of Him. By those whose judgement is clouded by their own interpretations and prejudices.
I am reluctant to challenge the rules. I don’t want theological/philosophical discussions. I don’t want tension, discord, or hurt feelings.
I want to write.